But, of course, I’m going to get more detailed with this one.
When I first began college at age 18, directly out of high school, I was totally over it. It felt almost as if I was repeating high school. I was bored so, I didn’t go to class. Overall, I just did not do well. School isn’t for everyone, and I thought I was one of those people.
That stunted me from trying again for years. I always felt like I lost my chance and I wouldn’t be able to keep up even if I did try. I felt like that chapter of my life was closed never to be opened again.
But, nearly ten years later, I began again. I was very nervous at first. I remember thinking the night before the first day that I had made a huge mistake and I had set myself up for failure. I believed there was no way I would be able to give my all as a mom, a worker, a spouse, and a student. I greatly underestimated myself.
If I had to guess, you’re probably underestimating yourself too. Doubt is creeping in everytime you try to entertain the thought.
I’m too busy…
I’m too exhausted…
I’m too old…
It’s been too long since I have been in school…
I’m not “teachable”…
I’m not smart enough…
The list can go on… but do any if those sound like some of your thoughts?
I gave myself every excuse in the book NOT to go back to college. All of those thoughts above went through my head. So, I get it. You always feel too much something and not enough of another. Why do we do that to ourselves? Aren’t there enough naysayers in our lives as it is?
So, the first step to going back to college is to STOP MAKING EXCUSES. Sorry to get all bold and capital on you, but the point must be made. I know, it’s so easy for someone to say, “I dont have time, I make time for it”. But, honestly, it’s condescending. There is only 24 hours in the day, people. You can’t do it all and sometimes certain things have to take a backseat to other things whether you like it or not.
The truth is, you may have to stay up a few hours later than usual to finish an essay.
You may have to get up extra early to study for an exam.
You may have to bake your daughter’s brownies for her Christmas party instead of doing your homework one night.
You may have to let the laundry pile up, close the books, and take a hot bath to relieve the stress from your body.
But, you CAN do it! No matter what your excuses are, no matter how heavy your insecurities feel, no matter what you have on your plate you CAN do it. Even when you feel like you can’t, you CAN and you will be proud of yourself for pushing through.
I’m not done yet. I have quite a bit more to go. It hasn’t been easy. I haven’t recieved A’s in every class, but I have done better than the year I was there after high school. I have learned self-discipline and how to prioritize my time. I have had to re-learn things and I have also learned brand new things. I have had to do things I didn’t want to do – like dissecting a worm and reading books centered around Greek mythology (no offense to Greek mythology lovers – just not my thing). But, I stopped making excuses and I finally started to trust myself.
And if going back to college is something you have wanted to do but you have never given yourself the chance, take it from someone who has been there, too… Trust yourself and jump into the unknown! You may just surprise yourself!
Either I am bombarded with reasons why we shouldn’t have chosen this route or I’m simply asked, “Why?” when I make mention of the fact that we’re a homeschooling family.
It’s often accompanied by a rather baffled and confused look, with a hint of sheer curiosity. Sometimes people sound especially judgmental with their Why – you know what I’m talking about. The Why that masks the much larger question of “What on earth would make you think you should do such a thing?!”
At one time, this might bother me. It would have made me feel inferior, ignorant, and at times, crazy.
Why would you choose to homeschool your children when there are people who specifically educated themselves to do just that?
Why do you want to shelter your children?
Why would you rather do that instead of get a “real” job?
Why do YOU think you are more equipped to teach your children than an ACTUAL teacher?
Obviously, they don’t ask any of those questions specifically. (Well, not usually.) However, most people who ask Why? Usually are concerned about one or more of those particular questions.
The funny thing is, I don’t really have the answers they want to hear. I didn’t have some kind of horrible experience with public school. In fact, my husband and I both went to public school. And while there are things we didn’t like about it, we didn’t hate it, nor did we experience anything traumatic during our school years. My daughter attended public school during her kindergarten year. Once again, there were things we weren’t happy with, but we didn’t hate it.
I don’t have a specific problem with teachers either. Some are absolutely wonderful, some are just okay, and then there are some who clearly should have chosen a different profession. Teachers, for the most part, are awesome and have my utmost respect. They shape young minds generation after generation. They play a big role in our society whether they truly realize it or not.
It’s also not an ego thing. I don’t think I am “smarter” than those teachers. I don’t think that just because I’m their mother, that means that I am an expert on every single subject or that I just became a genius because I gave birth. I don’t feel like I’m superior to teachers. But, I also don’t feel inferior to them. Like I said, it’s just not an ego thing. Sheltering my children is most certainly not the goal. Of course I filter things they watch, read, listen to. That’s not a homeschool thing. Parents who choose public or private schools do this as well. But as far as sheltering them from the world? No way. I want the exact opposite! Let’s SEE the world, meet new people, and build their own hope’s and dreams!
And as far as those who believe I homeschool to get out of having a “real” job – Well, that is another post for another day.
Obviously, I have thought about this. I wrote down every reason we decided to homeschool. And surprisingly, our main reasons had nothing to do with any of those things. I would like to share that list with you.
1. Nonconformity
I know that term makes it sound like I’m some kind of “fight the power” kind of mom, but that’s not what I mean here.
My husband and I talked extensively about how we felt about our public school experiences. There were many good things, but one thing all the negative things had in common was conformity. We often felt the need to “blend in” with everyone else – never be “too much” or “too little”.
For us, we want our children to get to learn without all those extra stressors. We want our kids to grow into their own individual selves without others telling them what they should be. We want them to know that it doesn’t matter what people THINK. It only matters what God SAYS. And he says that we are all “fearfully and wonderfully made”.
Don’t be mistaken, I’m aware that there are times that comparison and competition can actually have a positive impact. And there’s no way to actually eliminate any of those things in their lives. However, we like the idea of being able to minimize it when focusing on their education.
2. Flexibility
I think this is a common reason among homeschool families. The flexibility homeschooling allows you, as a family, is truly AWESOME.
First of all, let’s start with the obvious. If you’re a homeschooling family who loves to travel, you’re able to do so during any time of the year without concern of how many days your child has been absent from a building. Learning is possible anywhere in any setting. If that setting is the sand, the sea, and a few fishing poles, so be it! The setting could be Washington D.C. spent exploring the nation’s capital! The travel possibilities are endless!
And you don’t have to travel to experience that flexibility. You can have school in your own backyard, at the park, or on the drive to the grocery store if need be. We like to take school outside quite often. Sometimes, we take it to the swingset, then there are times when we bring a table and chairs outside to do our work.
3. Hope
This is the big one.
I’m not sure why I felt God calling me to homeschool. The idea was almost immediately planted in my heart when my daughter was born. I was sure it was what we needed to do. The feeling was so overwhelming and to put it simply… I just knew.
When I put my daughter in public school for her kindergarten year, it was rough. I had done so out of fear and doubt. As I said before, no, we didn’t have a horrible experience. Her teacher was great. We didn’t have any kind of issues with the faculty and she made good grades. But, she… more like, we… did struggle. The routine was rushed. Come home, have about 45 minutes to an hour to play outside, come in, eat supper, do homework, take baths, go to bed. After being at school for 8 hours already, she was coming home only to do even more work. Where was the time to be a kid?
Not only did the routine rush and extra “work” cut into her time of just being a carefree kid, it also cut into her attitude. It caused my mild-mannered, polite child to become irritable in just a matter of minutes. It wasn’t her. And every time we reached a school break, we all breathed a big sigh of relief. And things were much more at ease and at peace in our home. I knew exactly what the Lord was trying to show me.
So, when we decided to homeschool, we done so with a great hope in our hearts. A hope that we could give our kids the freedom that truly comes from learning. A hope that we would make more time for the little things in life. A hope that we could mix routine with spontaneity. A hope that we would ensure more time to enjoy their childhood. And a hope that we could show our children that with just a little hope in your heart, you can make a happy life. It may not always be perfect. Some days won’t be as beautiful. But, we can always be hopeful for the absolute best. And that hope only comes from the Lord.
I say all that completely aware that homeschooling is NOT for everyone. I do not think that every family is meant to homeschool. The reasons I listed may not seem like good enough reasons to some. That’s okay. We’re all just trying to do what’s best for our kids. I’m not saying that our path is the only path. But it is ours and I’m excited and hopeful about the future that is to come.
